Blog of Oleg Darya and Yegorka. Traveling with a Special Child

I get a lot of different feedback. I inspire someone to travel with babies, fly with babies, travel with babies to Europe or Asia and beyond ... But often they write to me something like “Here you are good, your children sit quietly on airplanes and are generally so quiet, etc. walking around a museum or sitting sedately and silently in a restaurant abroad is useless. For some reason, it seems to everyone that it’s only their children who want to run around the playground and squeal, and I drive mine through art galleries;))) Who knows me, children are like children, and the eldest daughter is noisy 99% of all children and was brought up (I reap the fruits of my own upbringing :) as a free and independent person with all the consequences of traveling abroad ... But we travel! And we do it in such a way that it is interesting for us and comfortable and healthy for our children!

That is, there is little experience in Russia, because abroad I often see children in wheelchairs and not only. In Thailand, where we lived for a year, I remember: for a whole month they brought a teenager in a stroller in the evening, brought them feet into the sea, and the whole family watched the sunset. The child had a very happy face! Then I watched an enthusiastic blind girl, whom, as I understood, her parents told how the sea looks like, everything around, collected stones for her, and so on. And once in the Louvre I saw a girl with Down syndrome, who was sitting on the floor in front of a painting and smiling...

Daria and Yegorka on the plane

Oleg, Daria, Egorka

Our son's name is Egor, he is now 2.9. He is deaf, can't see well and can't walk yet. There is no general diagnosis, because no one can bring everything together, well, or does not want to, since the case is not obvious. We assume genetics ourselves, that would explain everything. He recently had cochlear implant surgery and we hope this will help him speak in the future. We also continue to search for the cause, but already in the background, because the main thing is after all rehabilitation, which will not change even if we find out the diagnosis.

- You used to travel a lot, what changed after the birth of your son?

Since Egor was born, our attitude to travel has changed, as their purpose has changed. Now we can go somewhere for the sake of classes for our son, but if classes are not supposed, then we still have to take into account a bunch of points.

Airport

Yes, when we found out that something was wrong with Yegor, then at that moment all our dreams collapsed. The fact is that after the birth, we were going to leave for several years in Asia, we wanted to travel around different countries. There were even thoughts of moving to Thailand for a long time, trying on permanent residence. Just for work, it would be very convenient for me. But I had to abandon all these ideas and consider other countries for permanent residence. In fact, we are still in limbo.

In Thailand

We thought for a long time, gathered, put it off, and drove off. Well, and as I said, now trips are needed for the health of the child, so it’s good for him, and we travel. True, now we don’t really get out somewhere from rented housing, all the time is occupied by classes, life, and my work. Therefore, I won’t say that it’s super interesting, sometimes I miss my past carefree life.

The Lazhechnikov family

My son was 1 year 4 months old. The trip was not exactly rosy. Yegor ended up in intensive care with bronchitis, then spent a month and a half in the infectious diseases department, where he picked up local viruses one by one, and we decided to save him. When he recovered for the third time, we immediately packed up and went to the Black Sea. Still, the sea air, the sun, the food is better. At that time, he was completely emaciated, something had to be done.

The time was good, May-June. Just yet, the people had not arrived, but it was already warm, and the first fruits and vegetables went. We lived with friends in a private house, went to the sea. Didn't swim, but crawled along the beach. The child quickly revived.

Before your trip abroad, did you make any test trips on small trips around Russia, for example? Or just decided to go on a big trip?

Before the first foreign country, we went to the Black Sea, as I wrote above. And also there were a number of small trips out of town. In the summer, of course. We rode to friends in the eco-settlement, looked at estates in the Moscow region, went to the country. That is nothing so special, weekend trips.

And already when Yegor turned 1 year and 9 months old, we rushed to Thailand for the winter.

Yegorka is happy!

Thailand was well known to us, after all, we have already been there more than once, and our blog is also mostly devoted to Thailand. We were afraid of something else - to stay. And now, on the eve of next winter, we are again afraid. After all, we still don’t know why Yegor ended up in intensive care from the usual ARVI, and now every time he has snot, we start to get pretty nervous. Now I will omit that in Moscow in winter it is just a hotbed of some kind of disease, the problem is different. Yegor crawls, which means he is always on the floor in the apartment, where there are all sorts of drafts, etc. Of course, we covered the entire floor in the apartment with special warm rugs, but this does not save the situation. The same problem in winter with walks, crawling in the snow on playgrounds is still a pleasure.

The only thing we were worried about was how Egor would endure the hot climate. We flew from summer to summer on purpose so that there would be no sharp drop, but all the same, summer in Thailand is completely different. And the long flight scared us very much, because the son does not sleep even in ideal conditions, and then the plane ...

Classes in Poland

Of course he did. We had a route planned. First, we went to Koh Samui for 1-2 months, where we watched how Yegor would behave. It was also important for us that he could swim a lot and crawl on the sand, because we spent the summer in Moscow on trips to doctors and tests, we needed to recover a bit.

After we saw that everything was in order, we went to Bangkok for 3 months. This is not the best city for living with a child, but there we enrolled in a center where they work with children. It was the first center where we were not told that Yegor was still small, but simply took us and worked. We had 3 therapists, and it was in this center that one of the leaps in development took place. Yes, we ourselves worked with him all the time before, but the specialists are better at it. Although until now, all new deaf teachers are surprised how Daria was able to teach him at least some words with such a severe hearing loss.

I did the usual insurance, but we always tried to rent housing in a more comfortable way, so that there must be air conditioning and a kitchen, the terrace is not dangerous, closer to the beach. In Bangkok, they chose an apartment so that it was not far from the rehabilitation center. It has also always been important whether there are supermarkets and a hospital in the city, that is, we could not live in the wilderness now.

Thailand is one of the few countries where you can travel for more than 3 months. At the same time, there is an acceptable level of prices for everything, year-round summer, excellent fruits, and a rather friendly population. In my opinion, there is currently no other country in Southeast Asia where civilization and other parameters will be just as well combined. It is equally important that we already knew this country and we didn’t have to prepare for the trip, it takes time, and we don’t have much of it. Yes, Thailand has enough disadvantages, and we would be happy to go somewhere else next winter, however, I do not see an alternative.

Special children are very different ... And also different parents for these children. It's hard to say in general, I can only speak about us.

So, we basically adjust the whole trip now to Yegor. If this is not done, then the trip will crumble, we simply will not stand it. Either they are weak, or they are already tired in a few years. If earlier I could stay in a guesthouse with shared facilities, now only apartments. If earlier we could fly with transfers, or move around the country by bus, now we have direct flights and car rentals. If earlier we could visit several cities in a week, now we go to one place and sit there all the time.

Perhaps not entirely clear, but the purpose of travel is changing. Why are there goals, priorities in life become different. When you see how your child takes the first steps at 3 years old, even with orthoses and with a support, it cannot be compared with any impressions of a new attraction. Of course, I still find time and go somewhere, to the old city, to the waterfall, I can go hiking, or somewhere else, but this is more related to work (to write on a blog), or with a change of scenery. In general, the need for travel has greatly decreased, I want a calm and boring life more.

"Irresponsible" parents "drag" children here)))

Yes, I had to. In general, I noticed that there are a lot of advisers everywhere, although they have no idea what they are talking about. This feature can be recorded in the characteristic features of the Russian mentality. It is impossible to pass by and you must definitely speak out, although no one asked for advice. And the advice is different, from doctors say, to some other tales and stereotypes. Moreover, it is customary to forget that people are all different, and what suits one person does not suit another, but no, the adviser is simply the right one.

I reacted differently. If the doctor tells me this, then I don’t really argue, it’s useless. Moreover, other doctors say otherwise. I just always want to tell them that let's all agree among ourselves first, and then you will tell me. And then you come to one, he will write one diagnosis, to the second - another. What the heck? And in general, after a rich experience of communicating with our doctors, I not only realized that I needed to double-check everything a hundred times, but also that those who imagine themselves to be God and do not lower themselves from their pedestal to a discussion with the patient should not be dealt with at all. If they say something on the blog, then I enter into a discussion only with adequate people, then we can exchange cultural views and enrich each other. Inadequate same bath, I have no time for them. I am glad that we have a good audience, trolls do not wander in often.

By and large, we are parents, and we decide what is best for our child. We see it every day and we have the most sightings.

How Yegor sleeps

Our main difficulty is that Egor does not sleep. More precisely, he sleeps, but this requires a million conditions. When I see how children sleep in a stroller, in a car, how they are shifted sleepy, then this is just some kind of miraculous miracle. I won’t tell you in detail, but Egor here somehow didn’t even want to sleep from local anesthesia, to say nothing about everything else. So, constant motion sickness and waking up 10 times a night are very exhausting, so you will do everything to simplify your life. Hence the need for comfort arises, you save minutes, and you are ready to overpay for some little things. Therefore, it’s not so easy to move around, no matter what hotel you stay at…

The second difficulty is that Egor does not walk. You always have to think about what it will be like to crawl. It's one thing to go somewhere with a walking child, it's another thing to always pay attention to surfaces and think over clothes. For example, in Thailand, the asphalt in the city is very dirty, in Europe, at least crawl around. You also think about such moments as a park within walking distance from housing, or a playground, spacious housing ...

According to the rules of air transportation, we can carry a maximum of 3 suitcases, 3 hand luggage, and a stroller. This is more than enough for now. Now we went to Poland, took 2 suitcases and 2 hand luggage. In principle, our luggage is not much different, things are about the same, only the quantity may be different when compared with the minimalists that we ourselves were before. We used to travel exclusively with hiking backpacks, but now we have huge suitcases. I will list some not quite ordinary things.

- A set of toys, both on the plane and in general.
— Orthopedic shoes and orthoses.
— Cochlear implant and its accessories.
- Compact high chair (otherwise feeding turns into hell)
- Specialized books and manuals for classes.
- Nutritional supplements for food, and we can also take some pumpkin seed oil or buckwheat with us (you can’t buy it in Thailand).
- Multicooker and blender.

Of course, everything depends on the duration of the trip, if not for long, then we don’t take half of it. Plus, a person grows, and something ceases to be needed. Now, apparently, the blender will no longer be needed, because although he only eats pureed food, it has already become enough to knead with a fork.

In Thailand

I can say at the moment only about two countries: Thailand and Poland. Well, this is if you take personal experience, so it is well-read about others, of course.

We like Thailand very much for its benevolence. Yes, not everything is so obvious there, and smiles do not always mean smiles, but in general, people there are much more friendly than in Russia. And the Thais are very fond of children, and try to touch them and talk to them. I know not everyone likes it, but it worked for us. Egor, after resuscitation and the hospital, was not very open to this world, and everyone's attention only benefited him. On the other hand, Tai is not a country where society is tolerant of people with disabilities, it is probably customary to hide them, as in Russia. The only good news is that being a foreigner, you are, as it were, in your own caste, and they simply don’t care about you.

I remember once upon a time we were in Germany, in Munich. I was then amazed at how many disabled people they had on the streets. Naively, I thought that here it is the vaunted Germany and its vaunted medicine, in Russia there are even fewer disabled people. But then it dawned on me that the disabled person there is an ordinary person who continues to live his life, and does not rot in his apartment, because there is no ramp in the entrance. By the way, now in all countries you begin to pay attention to how everything is tailored to the needs of non-walking people ...

happy child)

We are going to China soon, again for rehabilitation. This time we will go for 3 months, they say, after classes there, the child can go. A friend's daughter went like this. And I don’t know what will happen next, we don’t make plans so far. Perhaps we will go to Bangkok for 2 winter months, or maybe to Spain, we need to wait out the very cold.

In general, it is no secret that we are looking for a country for permanent residence, where we can go with our son and live relatively comfortably there. In this regard, everything is still vague, because we need not only to choose a country that suits our requirements, but also so that our desires coincide with our capabilities. You can go to many places only through studies, but I won’t be able to study yet, I won’t have time just in time (work, plus Yegor’s business). If there was a good profession, it would be possible to leave on a work visa, but this is also not my option.

In Thailand

In this case, giving advice is inappropriate, I think. This is not a pleasure trip. Judging by the forums for special children, many parents travel to rehab, so we are not the only ones. If you decide to go somewhere, then most likely all the necessary information is already on the Internet, you can follow the beaten paths. The Internet is power! Yes, priorities change, but you can still travel on your own, if there is a desire and a goal !!!

geleosan

Cons of Tenerife We add it to bookmarks so that if you want to move, read again and stay at home 😜 No thanks! And then moving is such a hemorrhoid. ⠀ 🙈 Village. After Moscow, Singapore, and so on. There are no skyscrapers made of glass and metal, the breath of a big city, there are few opportunities for cultural leisure. Fans of megacities are not allowed here, they will die of boredom. ⠀ 🙈 Online stores. I don’t know how it is on the mainland in Spain, but after Moscow, where you can buy at least a dash of white with mother-of-pearl buttons in 2 clicks, Tenerife is sad with this. And there is no similarity to Yandex.Market. Shopping centers are also scarce. ⠀ 🙈 Cool. If an apartment is unsuccessfully chosen (not on the sunny side and in the north of the island), then it will be cool for those who love heat, 18-20 degrees. Central heating, of course, no. ⠀ 🙈 Dear communal apartment. But this applies to many countries, if compared with Russia. ⠀ 🙈 Little greenery. Not Thailand, and not even a forest near Tver. There is more or less vegetation, but it is all in the north of the island. By the way, in the south of Spain (Malaga-Valencia), everything is also bad with greenery, in my opinion. ⠀ 🙈 Island. Other countries are far away and only by plane. You can't get in a car and go on a trip. More precisely, you can, but to the mainland 2 days by ferry. ⠀ 🙈 Working hours. As in all of Europe, shops are not open 24/7 and some are closed on weekends. From the point of view of a consumer from Moscow, it is very inconvenient. ⠀ 🙈 Manyana and gouging. Perhaps this is typical of all of Spain, and not just Tenerife. The people are too relaxed, slow and do not take a steam bath. They also say that many do not shine with intelligence. ⠀ 🙈Medicine only on insurance, as in all of Europe. If in Russia medicine is free (although this is a controversial issue), then it is about 30-50 euros per person. ⠀ It's just like that. Upon first consideration. ⠀

Which is led by my friend Oleg Lazhechnikov (with the help of his wife Daria), and today the guys are my virtual guests.

Now they have returned to Moscow after another six-month trip to Asia, and we will talk about how they got to the point where they got rid of offices, work, and now they live in a kind of travel style.

Since we, cyclists, too, are always reaching for freedom, I am sure that my readers will be interested to know a little about the lives of those who have already managed to make serious progress in this direction.

Oleg and Daria in 2010 decided to leave a stable job and start making money on the Internet: travel and write about it on their website.

At first they traveled around Russia (Caucasus, Altai, Ural, Moscow region and surrounding regions), being office workers, and after being fired, they drove by car through Germany and the Czech Republic, hitchhiked through France and Turkey, went on a hike to the Crimea.

But then we went to Thailand, they liked it so much that the main topic of the site was this country, and today Oleg's site is the undisputed leader among blogs dedicated to independent travel in Thailand.

The guys even had the idea to go to Thailand for a long time, try to do business there and settle down, but a special child came into their lives, and their lifestyle and priorities changed quite a lot. Despite this, they sometimes try to get out somewhere and do not lose optimism.

Personally, I really like everything that Oleg does on his website, I always read his new articles with interest (although I haven’t managed to get to Asia yet), and most importantly, I like the philosophy with which this family lives and travels.

So let's get to the conversation. I ask Oleg the bulk of the questions, but I also prepared something for Daria, because for sure my readers will want to know if it is difficult to be a wife, mother and hostess on a constant journey.

VC. Oleg, how did you get the idea to start blogging professionally? What was the impetus - dismissal from work, or vice versa, have you long wanted to move away from the office and do some kind of freer activity?

OL. The idea was suggested to me by friends ... Since I myself am not a creative person, most often I just repeat after someone, like the Chinese. 🙂 I have wanted to work remotely for a long time, but I did not know that I could do this. Mostly my thoughts revolved around my engineering work, but none of the employers wanted to let me work at home even for one day, and freelancing is very unstable.

And one day, I found out that my friends began to earn good money on the Internet, and in particular, they run a website. True, they had almost no income from the site (they were engaged in traffic arbitrage), but they told me that in general it is real if you deal with it all the time and have a lot of traffic.

And then I decided to blog about travel, while still working in the office. Perhaps it was the need to write (great-grandfather was a writer), or maybe there was simply nothing in my head except travel, and besides, I could describe my old trips. At that time, this was the only thing that was terribly lacking in my life, and because of which I even quit several times, unable to wait for a vacation.

Two months after I started blogging, I was suddenly laid off. But I was not upset at all, because I was mentally prepared for such a turn. It was a little stressful that I had a car loan hanging on me, and initially I planned to pay it off first, and then think about quitting, but then fate decided everything for me, so to speak, moved the deadlines.

VC. Did you and Daria share your plans with someone at the very beginning? The idea of ​​not working, but getting paid by pissing on a blog is still perceived quite skeptically, and only a few years ago ...

For example, I tell my friends and relatives that I work as a remote programmer, it's easier than if you say that you make money on the Internet on sites. 🙂

OL. Of course they shared! Our friends and parents knew about it. Naturally, everyone looked skeptical, but we did not present it as something grandiose. Rather, something like “we want to try something new, and then how it goes.” We are young, there is time for tests.

For a long time, parents asked when we would get a normal job, but then they stopped. Apparently they saw that we live normally, there is enough of everything, we are not in poverty, and we do not plan to change anything. In general, it was all the same, without pressure. Although I think it is difficult for them to understand, in their time there were no such opportunities.

VC. Did you have any plan at that time, or did you most of all want to get rid of the office, and there already where the curve of luck will take you?

OL. You know, my plans are tight. I wish I could plan everything, but I can't. Instead, there was a certain burning desire to do something, and just without a plan. But I won’t say that we then rushed into a whirlpool with our heads: we had savings, we sold the car, and we always kept in mind that if something went wrong, we would return to work.

In Moscow, it is not so difficult to find her (even with a lower salary), especially since we have a place to live. But at the same time, there was such a fuse of enthusiasm and a holy belief that everything would work out that I was surprised at myself.

VC. At first, you hitchhiked across Europe, traveled around Russia and the CIS, and at what stage did you get the desire to go to Thailand?

OL. It is difficult to say when the desire arose. Our first year was very busy, in fact, we did all the main travels at the beginning of blogging. I remember reading various blogs of other people, and somehow I came up with a topic about wintering in Thailand.

And since we have long wanted to try to escape from the winter, we did not think very long. Although, of course, such a long departure was for the first time, and the jitters were present, Asia is a completely different culture, and for so long away from home ...

VC. Was it difficult to decide? After all, they went for a long time and were very limited in funds, as far as I understand. How much money did you spend per month in Thailand back then?

OL. Not very difficult, because it was terribly interesting, but how people live there in the east. Regarding the limited funds, the budget and financial planning helped us a lot. This is the only plan in my life.

I have been budgeting for a long time, and I don’t know how it could be otherwise. Actually, when I was fired, I immediately calculated everything a year ahead: how much we can spend, whether we need to sell the car, when there will be a critical point, and so on. Therefore, we went to Thailand with the confidence that we would live and not go anywhere.

We then spent a little, somewhere around 15-25 thousand baht per month (500-800 dollars) for everything about everything, along with trips. And for the first time I felt what it is like to live doing what you love, you really don’t need almost anything, because you don’t need to please yourself if everything is fine anyway. I still remember that feeling of euphoria. And due to the fact that we worked hard and sat at home, there was nowhere to spend much.

VC. In fact, the Thai theme brought you everything - website traffic, fame (within your niche), money, freedom. What do you think, if you had stayed in Moscow then (for example, you were offered a cool job), how would everything have turned out now, would nature have taken its toll or not?

I'm asking in the sense that you would trade your lifestyle now for a guaranteed quiet life with a decent income. From experience, so to speak.

OL. Unfortunately, or fortunately, it is impossible to live several lives at the same time, so we have no idea what it would be like if we stayed in Moscow. Now, from the height of my experience, I understand that you can write on a blog on completely different topics, and those related to Moscow could bring much more money with less effort.

But, if we talk about working in the office, then most likely, no matter how cool the job is, I would not have survived there for a long time, for me it is akin to a cage where they locked me. I always waited for 6 o'clock in the evening in order to leave home as soon as possible "on call".

It's funny, but I work more now than at the office then, but it doesn't bother me, rather the opposite, just give me free rein, I won't get out from behind the computer at all. I never thought that I could work so hard.

Well, you have to understand that in reality no one would offer an ordinary engineer a cool job. It is necessary to go up the career ladder step by step, because nothing happens so easily, but I have no cronyism anywhere. So, answering your hypothetical question, I might have changed it, but for a while, I would have worked for a year, saved up money (the job is a cool type), and then continue to work on my projects again.

VC. And when did you start to realize that blogging was turning into a lifestyle and income for the family? And most importantly - how did you manage not to lose enthusiasm long before the first tangible money came?

OL. I tried blogging as a way of life while in Thailand, yet traveling is a cool thing. And as income, two years later, when more or less noticeable amounts went. And just when there was some income, I already started to evaluate all the trips in terms of whether I need it for a blog or not, and it has become even more a way of life.

I managed not to lose my enthusiasm for only one reason - I really did not want to go back to the office. Most of all, I needed to be able to go somewhere spontaneously and without a return ticket, and also to stop getting stuck in traffic jams to work, which I never got used to in my entire life in Moscow. Well, for a very long time my wife and I wanted to leave Moscow somewhere in a quiet place, but there’s no way without remote work.

Now travel has faded into the background, but I still like to have my time. Yes, I also miss him, but I can afford not to work for a while, or go to one or another instance without asking the boss for time off.

After the birth of my son, I regularly have to live in the mode of working for a week, not for a week, taking my family to the doctors. What employer would give an engineer that kind of freedom? Of course, some will say about a taxi or a hired driver / nanny, but I doubt that I would have risen as an engineer to afford it, here it would be necessary to take a person almost full-time.

VC. Do you consider yourself quite successful in your field (without being shy) and what is the secret?

OL. What a tricky question. Yes and no. On the one hand, indeed, among similar blogs, I'm kind of ahead of the rest, and on the other hand, my efforts would, but in the right direction.

Actually, this is the secret: I just do a lot of blogging, usually no one does that. I write a lot of articles, answer all questions in the comments, tinker with blogging, SEO, think about usability and structure all the time.

But I have repeatedly said on my blog that this is not an effective way to make money on a travel blog, it is too labor-intensive. If it were not for my enthusiasm and obstinacy, it is unlikely that something happened. And now I myself am thinking about how I can spend my efforts more efficiently.

VC. And why are there a lot of bloggers writing about Thailand, and only you have achieved results?

OL. At a minimum, I started earlier than many, and now the age of the site plays a big role. Well, and purposefully hollowed out the topic of Thailand for 4 years in a row.

VC. If you had a business card, what would it say: blogger, freelancer, traveler, something else?

OL. I have a business card, and nothing like that is written there. Only my name, a link to the site and mail. In general, I am more of a blogger than a traveler, because I blog 90% of the time, and travel the rest.

VC. Is it hard to bear the burden of a famous blogger - after all, they recognize it on the street (at least in Thailand)?

OL. They even recognized me a couple of times in Moscow, can you imagine? 🙂 It’s not hard to bear the burden, because they often find out only in Thailand, and it doesn’t bother me at all. I am not some kind of celebrity, but an ordinary person, and I behave like an ordinary person, I do not suffer from star diseases.
On the contrary, it’s so great to meet someone, because all regular readers are like old friends, we have a lot in common, we have something to talk about, otherwise we wouldn’t be reading.

It’s hard only in the virtual, when you relax and get used to it. For example, you publish an article for old readers: they are aware of what happened before, they know our other views, they do not need to specifically explain and clarify something in the article.

And then someone new comes along and essentially takes some phrase out of context. Some, with their conclusions based on a couple of paragraphs, are simply discouraging. It seems to me that it is generally strange to draw conclusions about a person from a blog, because in any case, he only shows the tip of the iceberg there.

VC. If now someone reading us wants to go the way of a full-time blogger, does he have a chance in travel topics?

OL. Everyone has a chance, I'm sure of it, but I would not recommend going into the travel theme without understanding what you will do in it. I wrote a separate article on this topic, if anyone is interested,.

The classic scheme “I write what I see” will not bring earnings now. There are too many of these, you will not surprise anyone with this. And here you need either some original writing style or travel format (attracting a readership), or a large supply of enthusiasm for posting information (attracting search traffic). The latter is no longer a classic travel blog, but more like an information portal, this is just my version.

Kotovsky's note: about the professional maintenance of the site, I gave an interview to Oleg a little earlier - you can.

VC. Why do you think all bloggers are so bothered with motivation ... in my understanding - you either realize your plans, or go to the place that Tyoma Lebedev spoke about. But still, how do you cope with the drop in enthusiasm?

OL. They bother, because it is human nature to give up. And also, because many are led for free, they say, there is a lot of money on the Internet, for this you don’t need to really work, you don’t need to know anything. But no head here.

In addition, there is also the wrong setting of goals. A person started a blog as a favorite thing, and for some reason it seems to him that this is a sufficient condition for him to automatically bring money. Although earnings must be dealt with purposefully, and this is a slightly different approach.

I deal with a drop in enthusiasm very simply: I go upset for 1-2 days, and then go back to work, because I have no choice but to sit idly by.

Now let's move on to Daria's questions.

VC. What is your lifestyle for you - is it a path that must lead somewhere? Or is the process itself important?

DL. It depends what you mean by "our way of life". 🙂 The fact that Oleg does not go to the office to work and does not report to some stranger, but works for himself?

Or the fact that we adhere to the principles of natural parenting? Or the fact that we monitor our health as much as possible, do not drink, do not smoke and eat selectively?

Or that we are helping our special son to grow up and overcome all the difficulties that he will have to overcome? Then I consider it all my life. And life is both a path that will lead somewhere, and the process itself. In, bent, right? 🙂 In fact, we do not really feel that our way of life is somehow particularly different from the majority. There are nuances, but who doesn't? 🙂

VC. Daria, how did Oleg manage to persuade you to completely change your life? You quit your job, as far as I know. Stability is important for women, and you are like this - without a job, in Moscow, with virtually no means of subsistence, with unclear prospects. You don't look like an adventurer. 🙂

DL. I wonder why I don't look like an adventurer? 🙂 Although, you are right, it was difficult for me to decide on this. However, it was not difficult for me to imagine what our life would be like after the dismissal, because we had already lived like that once, even more boldly than this time.

When Oleg and I first met and all those two years while we were friends with him, each of us already lived such a free, almost hippy life. We were very young, brave and careless. Neither he nor I had a permanent job, we just worked part-time to earn enough to live on, and then our requests were very modest (thank God, we are both Muscovites and we didn’t have a housing issue).

We lived very modestly, but now we remember this time as very bright, kind and harmonious. Then we “matured up”, both got a job with a good salary and lost that spirit of freedom and lightness.

When Oleg offered me to quit, I got scared, because it seemed to me that I would no longer be able to live the way I used to, then in my youth. And I hesitated, he let me think and left with a friend on an interesting hitchhiking trip around Turkey.

He traveled around this beautiful country, and I sat and checked invoices, translated the catalog of clothes ... And when he returned, a little different, because he had experienced so many interesting things in such a short time, I realized that I wanted to share all these vivid emotions and impressions with him, and not learn everything from stories and photos. I wrote a letter of resignation almost the next day after Oleg returned.

And stability ... far from everyone and not always needs it ... Now, when such an unusual son came to us, I need it and I am very glad that Oleg succeeded in the end. And then I didn’t need it, completely different things were important to me.

VC. Who is the idea generator in your family tandem?

DL. Undoubtedly - Oleg. Personally, I am the generator of chaos and disorder in our home. And Oleg is the keeper of order and an endless generator of ideas, and today's idea can be almost diametrically opposed to yesterday's. That's how we live. 🙂

VC. Traveling as a way of life - is it freedom or not? If you look from the outside, you and Oleg achieved what you wanted - you are not tied to the office, you have money for travel, you live where you want. On the other hand, there are a lot of restrictions and its own specifics, which are not always pleasant. There is no desire to change all this for stability (at least for you)?

DL. For me, traveling is freedom, yes, definitely. This is the freedom of movement, and the ability to manage yourself and your time, this is the freedom of thoughts and views. But what limiting specifics you are talking about, I do not quite understand.

That income is different every month - so with proper budget planning, this is not a problem. That income today is income, but tomorrow it is not? So in office work, too, there is this specificity - today you work, and tomorrow you were asked to make room. And also no stability. 🙂

We now have another specificity in life in the form of a special boy who needs a whole team of rehabilitation specialists, preferably Russian speakers, to put him on his feet and help him adapt to our world. But this “specificity” just hinders the travelling itself, and not vice versa.

VC. Well, by “specifics” I meant, for example, that when you constantly travel, everything is temporary, houses and cars are different, the social circle is constantly changing. At first it pleases and inspires, but then it starts to tire.

Okay, let's get back to you. Many of your readers believe that you are special (in terms of attitude to life and money), is it an acquired quality or is it all about upbringing and character?

DL. No, I'm not special, unfortunately. It would be easier to live if I were one, but it's not. I, like everyone else, need money (just maybe not in such quantities as many). Oh, and about my attitude to life - this is generally a sore subject, I have a lot of internal cockroaches, with whom I have been fighting fierce battles for a long time.

Answering your question, my attitude to life has been formed and is being formed in many ways through tough slaps in the face from fate: I have a very difficult, painful relationship with my mother, which hurt me a lot, I lost my first baby, the second baby was born with strong features, I have an unusual relationship with my husband, here you want it or you don’t want to develop a special attitude to life.

Well, education, of course, played a role, both positive and negative (hello, to all my unfinished cockroaches).

VC. What is your contribution to blogging - do you help Oleg write, offer ideas for notes, edit texts, or is Egor taking all the time at this stage?

DL. When the blog was just starting, I tried to write articles on a par with Oleg, but can you keep up with him, behind this little motor. Well, then I freeloaded a lot, and he really worked hard, I just don’t know how. Therefore, I also wrote articles before, but not in the same quantity as my husband. And I always edited, although now I often do not have time to check the article before it is published and I correct the already published material.

But now I rarely write, because I don’t know how to write briefly, and I write each article for weeks, and after it is published, I also answer comments for several days (and since during the day I devote all my time to my son, I write and answer readers at night, which is very exhausting, given that Egor does not sleep at night, and I am constantly sleepy).

VC. What do you do when everything is bad and hands drop?

DL. I cry, I roar very, very strongly, shouting out everything that has accumulated, everything that worries and devastates, as if I am complaining to someone. And it helps a lot, it's like a sharp splash of negativity, after that it immediately eases. 🙂

And sometimes I write notes in which I also splash out everything that makes me feel bad. And I console myself with the hope that maybe someday I will anonymously start a livejournal where I will post all this, just so that it goes somewhere, and not stored on the computer “unspoken”.

And recently I remembered that I love to dance. I didn’t remember about it for two years, and then suddenly it came like a revelation. And now, when I can't cry out loud, I throw everything out in the dance. I rock Egor, put on my headphones, turn on the music loudly and start dancing like a fool, until I'm completely tired. The next couple of days the mood is steadily upbeat. It's a pity, it's not always possible to dance like that - Yegor does not sleep well.

VC. I also decided to ask concluding questions to both Oleg and Daria:

You have already traveled around the world, what do you say - is there a place where you will come and it will always be good?

Oleg:
If you are talking about heaven, then there is no such place on earth. In any country, there are pluses and minuses, and they are not objective, they depend on a particular individual and his perception. That is why some people emigrate to one country, others to another, and still others stay at home.

Just remember that the first impression of the country can be deceptive, in order to “try on” it for yourself, you need to live in it for at least a year, and traveling can help in this regard. It is also advisable not to run away from yourself to other countries, otherwise it will overtake you anyway.

Daria:
My place is France. Too many warm, good memories with this country, culture, language. These people and places are right on the same wavelength with me, I feel very good in any corner of this country.

VC. How much money do you need to earn remotely in order to freely ride around the world in your style (without showing off, but also without being poor)?

Oleg:
Our style after the appearance of our son has changed quite a lot, so we will talk about how it was before. About 800 USD was enough for us. for two, for an economical life with periodic movements. I know that, as a rule, the sums of budget travelers are about 300-1500 USD.

But here you need to understand that life on a long journey (traveling) is fundamentally different in price from ordinary vacation trips. Funds are spent differently, there are no such expenses as "oh, I live once." After all, it’s one thing a person once a year escaped for a week and got fed up with everything at home, and it’s quite another thing when you are satisfied with your work, not really tired, and you can safely spend several months in the country like a local resident.

It is equally important to understand that show-off / poverty is a very relative concept, and therefore you should not focus on the amounts of other people without sharing their views on spending in general. In my calculations, I always tried to indicate in which apartment they lived, what they ate, how they moved, but this is not enough. In the same Thailand, not everyone will be ready to spend time and, for example, find cheaper housing. Take the first one that comes along and then conclude that Tai is expensive.

VC. Is it emotionally difficult to live in several countries? Permanent moving, visarans, rented housing, rented cars.

Oleg:
No, it's not at all difficult if there is such an attitude. On the contrary, it is interesting: you come, imbued with life, arrange housing, and then, when you get bored, you go further. Naturally, it is desirable to be a minimalist here, or, conversely, to earn a lot. And when the mood ends, you want to take long pauses or even settle in one place. As a rule, many travelers then settle down for years where they like it the most.

When our son appeared, we began to need much more comfort, and in this regard, it is not economically feasible to live in several countries. It is also difficult in time, to get enough sleep, and not to equip housing. That is why we practically don’t go anywhere, only we went to Thailand for the winter after a long break in travel, but I don’t know if we will go there again. Only if the base from Moscow is moved there ...

Daria:
In an emotional sense, it is very interesting to live like this. But in terms of money, it turns out to be costly, because now each place has to be equipped as a stationary one, and then all these things are left to the next tenants. And the fees are very tiring, because you are afraid of not taking into account and forgetting something.

But this unforgettable aching and warm feeling that something new and interesting is about to happen is incomparable to anything. And personally, I really love the first days in a new place, when it is just settling in, when you see how it is gradually turning from a strange place into your cozy home before your eyes ...

VC. Three things that make you not want to stay in Russia.

Oleg:
I would not say that we do not want to stay, rather we are thinking about a second citizenship and living in two countries. Moreover, I constantly try to pay attention to the good in Russia, and it is! But sometimes they just give up when reality is stronger than me. Basically everything revolves around the fact that I do not see a normal future for my son.

We would like a more tolerant society for the disabled, where their rights are respected. A society where they do not become outcasts, but can live a full life: get a job, move around the streets without problems, do not fight every day for a parking lot for the disabled with compatriots who think “I don’t give a shit.”

The world of people with disabilities is completely different, ordinary people do not know about it. You see, I could fight for rights, but this takes time and effort, which should first of all go to people close to you, and then to everything else. That is why now it would be great to live in more tailored conditions for us. But where they are, I don't know.

And from what I personally would like (the second and third points) is a milder climate and a normal civilization at the same time. And then in Russia we have only one region with a normal climate - the Krasnodar Territory, but with civilization there is so-so. Conversely, in cities where there is civilization, the climate is unsuitable.

Daria:
An uncertain future for our son, who will always have a disability due to hearing and, as a result, poor employment, alienation of people, uncomfortable, unadapted living conditions.

Insecurity, and not so much in a criminal sense, but in impunity. That is, the feeling that if something happens, there is nowhere to turn for help.

The complete incompetence of all ordinary medical workers, to whom they may be lucky enough to get when calling for an ambulance and urgent hospitalization.

VC. Thank you very much for the interesting communication, I hope your example will inspire everyone who wants to radically change their lifestyle. Anything is possible if you really want to and work hard.

I hope we will get to know each other personally, come visit us in Estonia, we have a good summer!

OL. And thank you, Victor, for the opportunity to speak on your site, we haven't been asked anything for a long time. We will be in Estonia, and we will definitely be there someday, we will definitely visit.

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